Sunday, January 28, 2007

What to do at meetings

Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? A friend shared this great method. See if it works for you.

1. Before (or during) your next meeting, seminar, or conference call, prepare for the meeting by drawing a square -- 5"X5" is a good size.

2. Divide the square into columns -- five across and five down. That will give you 25 one-inch blocks

3. In each block, write one of the following words/phrases:

.....synergy
.....strategic fit
.....core competencies
.....best practice
.....bottom line
.....revisit
.....take that offline
.....24/7
.....out of the loop
.....benchmark
.....value-added
.....proactive
.....win-win
.....think outside the box
.....fast track
.....result-driven
.....empower(ment)
.....knowledge base
.....at the end of the day
.....touch base
.....mindset
.....client focus(ed)
.....ballpark
.....game plan
.....leverage

4. Whenever you hear any one of those words/phrases, check off the appropriate block.

5. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout BULLSHIT


Testimonials from satisfied "Bullshit Bingo" players:

"I had been in the meeting for only five minutes when I won." -- JW, Boston

"My attention span at meetings has improved drastically." -- DD, Miami

"What a gas! Meetings will never be the same for me after my first win." -- SS, NYC

"The atmosphere was tense in our last process meeting as 14 of us waited for the fifth box." -- JR, St. Louis

"The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed BULLSHIT! for the third time in two hours." -- KL, Atlanta

Source unknown

3 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:35 PM

    What if all the meetings I attend are conducted in Japanese?


    I haven't done this for a while:

    Remaining awake during meetings
    Gives my poor, tired head nasty beatings.
    Glib and dull yammering,
    Japanese stammering,
    Oh, the pain...and the merits are fleeting.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MM, why don't you translate all of that into Japanese and get your fellow-workers to play along? I can imagine all hell with let loose. LOL!

    Japanese gives you a headache?
    Better than it giving you a heartache
    Alas! Meetings are necessary
    But not if you strike a lottery.
    Visibly grinning silly by the lake.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This list applies to every minute in your business life. Very comprehensie but hard to meet..

    ReplyDelete