Why did the Chicken cross the road?

This, I found from my archives. I'm a sucker for articles
like these so you can imagine the gems (I like to call it that)
I have in my almost 4GB of stuff in my PC. Oops!!

So, here is the age-old time-immemorial simple question.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

The common logical answer is of course, to get to the other side.
But consider the various categories of people in this world and
the genius in them would give interesting different answers.
Check them out. Btw, this wasn't drafted by me, so please,
don't hold it against me for what chicken-sh*t you're about
to read below.

A N S W E R S
=============
KINDERGARTEN TEACHER:
>> To get to the other side.

ARISTOTLE:
>> It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

RONALD REAGAN:
>> I forget.

ARTHUR ANDERSEN CONSULTANT:
>> Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening
its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with
significant challenges to create and develop the competencies
required for the newly competitive market.
Andersen, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped
the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy
and implementation processes.
Using the Poultry Integration Model (P! IM), Andersen helped
the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital
and experiences to align the chicken people, processes and
technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program
Management framework.
Andersen convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and
best chickens along with Andersen consultants with deep skills
in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary
of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge
capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to
synergize with an enterprise-wide value framework across the
continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was
held in a park-like setting, enabl! ing and creating an
impactful environment whic h was strategically based,
industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and
unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission,
vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the
creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen
helped the chicken change to become more successful.

RICHARD M. NIXON:
>> The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did
NOT cross the road.

JERRY SEINFELD:
>> Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever
think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking
around all over the place, anyway?

BILL GATES:
>> I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will
not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important
documents, and balance your checkbook.

MAHATHIR:
>> You know, I am tired of all this..'apa-nama'
chicken-chicken bisnes.... the foreign powers should stop
intervening in our domestic affairs and just leave our
chickens alone..... if they want to...'apa nama'
cross the road, they should be allowed to cross the road ..
Malaysia is a democratic country,we let our chickens do
whatever they want to do....as long as they don't threaten the
malay unity and try to topple the government...and if they plan
to do so...we wont hesitate to use the ISA...

ABDULLAH BADAWI:
>> Ini semua ! adalah khabar angin sahaja...jangan percaya khabar
- khaba r angin ini semua...biasalah ini adalah taktik
pembangkang untuk memecah belahkan perpaduan ayam - ayam
semua...jangan percaya..jangan percaya....

SAMY VELLU :
>> ayyooyoo...belakang cerita lain kali, kalu itu ayam mau pigi
jalan-jalan,beritau sama saya juga, saya bolley buat lebbey
banyak toll........

COLONEL SANDERS:
>> I missed one?