Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The Best Medicine...Laughter

I haven't been posting jokes lately, so here are some to continue the tradition. Enjoy.

Why divorce?
In a divorce court a woman requested the judge:
"Your honor, I want to divorce my husband."

"But why?" asked the judge.

She replied, "Because he is not faithful to me."

The judge asked, "How do you know?"

She replied, "My lord, not a single child resembles him."


Love Your Enemy
From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said,
"One month after I die I want you to marry Samy."

"Samy! But he is your enemy!"

"Yes, I know that! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now."


Same Service
A husband visited a marriage counselor and said,
"When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking. Now after ten years it's all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking."

"Why complain?" said the counselor.
"You're still getting the same service!"


Love To Do
A wife, one evening, drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said,

"Do you see that couple?
How devoted they are?
He kisses her every time they meet.
Why don't you do that?"

"I would love to." Replied the husband.
"But I don't know her well enough."


No Answering Back
A man was telling his friends,
"When my wife is infuriated, she starts shouting at me, my children and even at our dogs and nobody dares answer her."

One of his friends asked.
" And when you are angry, what do you do?"

The man replied,
"I also shout angrily at the windows and doors of the house and none of them dares to answer back.


Coming Home Late
A woman was complaining to the neighbor that her husband always came home late, no matter how she tried to stop him.

"Take my advice," said the neighbor, "and do what I did.
Once my husband came home at three o'clock in the morning, and from my bed I called out:

"Is that you, Jim?"

And that cured him.

"Cured him !" asked the woman, "but how?"
The neighbor said, "You see, his name is Bill."


Problem Father
"You look troubled," I told my friend,
"what's your problem?"

He replied, "I'm going to be a father."

"But that's wonderful," I said.

"What's wonderful? My wife doesn't know about it yet.


And this one must be taken with a huge pinch of salt. Guys to note.




Source: Unknown

23 comments:

  1. Those are pretty good! Thanks!

    What's the hair color of the woman in the "Why Divorce?" story?

    Being largely cut off from Western entertainment media, I'm not really familiar with Alphaville. That video seems incredibly 80s-ish, and the singer reminds me of The Cure.

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  2. Hahaahaaa... got me rolling there... especially the Samy, Bill ones...

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  3. MM, hair color? Need you ask?! LOL

    Alphaville, actually I just found out that they're the original singers of this song, Forever Young one of their two biggest hits, the other being (now get this!) Big in Japan. Know this song? Off-hand, I'm not familiar.

    Alphaville is an '80s synthpop-rock music group from Berlin. For more info, you may want to google it.

    Btw, have you heard Forever Young performed by a group of young kids, say around tennish? They do a pretty neat act too. They've recorded an album of oldies performed exactly to the original version. Some numbers that come to mind are We will rock you, Tainted Love, Walk like an Egyptian and Shout. Great act actually.

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  4. Lrong, glad you enjoyed them. LOL!

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  5. I LOVE the last one the best!

    (run, yd, run)

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  6. good jokes and very funny! keep them coming!

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  7. LOLOLOLOLOL!!! Good for banishing Tuesday Blues! Thank you! I love the last one best too!

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  8. YD, no need to run afterall the truth hurts. LOLOLOLOL... oh boy, we may need to borrow Robin's metal table but he probably has brought it over to Washington where he might need it. *More LOL*

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  9. SF, thank you and please keep coming back. ;)

    Btw, are you coming up to KL for the annual blogger meet?

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  10. Really like the jokes..laughter is indeed the best medicine when the spirit is low...many thanks!

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  11. LB, you are welcome. Wei! Tuesday also got blues, meh? Poor thing! So sporting too.

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  12. Hi Joe, glad you like the jokes and hope all's well at your end.

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  13. Anonymous11:38 AM

    haha!
    we can always do with good jokes!
    thanks!

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  14. Anonymous1:47 PM

    hehehe....men!!

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  15. I just got this from a friend (married, actually!) this morning & thought you'd enjoy!

    Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said, "NO!
    And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, traveled more, had many boyfriends, didn't save money, and had all the hot water to herself.
    She went to the theater, never watched sports, never wore fricken lacy lingerie that went up her backside, had high self-esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants.

    THE END

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  16. FH2O, hey, you're welcome. Come back for more.

    IML, hehe..

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  17. Bonnie, I love this! In fact, it is so good I'm going to post it. I hope it's okay with you. Thanks for sharing that. LOL

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  18. Anonymous10:11 AM

    I loved the last one too...

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  19. interesting =)

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  20. Ian, you are so sporting also. hehe..

    Hi Kurakat, thank you for stopping by.

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  21. Kurakat, would love to visit your blog but unable to locate your webpage from your profile. Please advise.

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  22. Anonymous1:33 PM

    Awesome! Now, I have something to text to my friends. hehe!

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  23. Hey Rej, yeah, have fun.

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